"death and hell a half on a cracker with a pepper and a half... without cheese!" yes my friends that about sums up my day at school. its hell week... **cough** exam week. its an emotional rollercoaster out there, folks, you got your ups and downs, your g-force curves and the occasional corkscrew... but always exams are looming as the dark, ominous, skanky, greenish light at the end of that tunnel in the house of horrors. the semester is almost over but the teachers feel they need to give us one more kick in the crotch before we can enjoy ourselves properly. see, they feel that if we can't enjoy ourselves before break and if they take a day off our breaks after the new year, they will get some kind of sick pleasure... the kind that some people get when they intentionally ruin someone's day with a cruel prank or ruin someone's week with a cruel essay. damn the essays! anyway, you get my point so i will go a little more specific. the exams today were gopo and band... the journey was trecherous and the seas were rough but i managed to come through only slightly brain damaged and slightly worse off in the hand and eye cramp department...
gopo was the exam i mentioned in the initial quote this fine december night. see, i can be happy now because tomorrow's exams arent going to be as hard, or so i hear. but gopo was different. my teacher has a way of being unique and she surely likes to transpose that uniqueness to her exams. see the way she sees it is that if she makes us do a multiple choice section first then we will be too tired to do an essay (damn the essays!) section. using this hypothesis, she adjusted the grading accordingly. as far as i'm led to beleive, the essay (damn the essays!) is worth more than the multiple choice section. this is of course crazy, seeing as i have no idea what i actually wrote 5 pages about because my brain and subsequently my memory was in severe shock at those very crucial moments of interrogation. the multiple choice was 80 questions long... 80 fucking questions people! thats practically a test and a pepper and a half, not to mention the cracker. once i had finished that part, i was relieved to be finished, finally. of course then i was unwillingly grabbed by the scruff of the neck and plunged face first into the murky depths of the twin 4-part essay (damn the essays!) half of the test. in fact it took up more than its alloted half of the test, the greedy s.o.b. took me a full hour to do that! thats 15 minutes longer than the 80 MC's! after all that, 3 pens, and a few too many hand and eye cramps, i completed the gopo exam in time to immerse myself into no thought. i found i couldnt think after that exam, what an odd feeling. i could have stood staring at a brick wall and woke up an hour later, really folks, it was that bad. screw gopo....
my 2nd shit-fest of the day wasnt as bad as the first. band is typically an easy class, you play some, lie some and you're through. but the lying catches up to you on an exam. at least there were no essays (damn the essays!). first we have theory... i dont know why in the hell they would teach us theories instead of real stuff. i mean, what if it changes and we have to learn it all over again? what if we get hit by an asteroid with a new gas element and it gets mixed in with the air and the vibrations and wavelengths change and they have to rewrite the theory? what then?? anyway, we had a theory test and that was easy so i dont care... pt 2 was on rock music which of course i did great on because one of my mottos is "i love rock music" so it was easy. last, we had a friggen score study which inherently looks easy until you learn that you failed it so i dont worry about it. last of all we had scales and "sightreading." umm question: why is it called sight reading when you read all music by sight? but anyway, i screwed up the scales of course cuz im a moron but thats ok because i had fun doing it. the "sightreading" wasnt too hard but was hard enough to embarrass me sooo i screwed that up too, typical of me and my exam habits. but its all allright because that day is over and tomorrow is a new day with new exams and hopefully there will be another post and maybe tomorrow there will be cheese on my hell/pepper cracker... please god, dont skimp with the cheese....
gopo was the exam i mentioned in the initial quote this fine december night. see, i can be happy now because tomorrow's exams arent going to be as hard, or so i hear. but gopo was different. my teacher has a way of being unique and she surely likes to transpose that uniqueness to her exams. see the way she sees it is that if she makes us do a multiple choice section first then we will be too tired to do an essay (damn the essays!) section. using this hypothesis, she adjusted the grading accordingly. as far as i'm led to beleive, the essay (damn the essays!) is worth more than the multiple choice section. this is of course crazy, seeing as i have no idea what i actually wrote 5 pages about because my brain and subsequently my memory was in severe shock at those very crucial moments of interrogation. the multiple choice was 80 questions long... 80 fucking questions people! thats practically a test and a pepper and a half, not to mention the cracker. once i had finished that part, i was relieved to be finished, finally. of course then i was unwillingly grabbed by the scruff of the neck and plunged face first into the murky depths of the twin 4-part essay (damn the essays!) half of the test. in fact it took up more than its alloted half of the test, the greedy s.o.b. took me a full hour to do that! thats 15 minutes longer than the 80 MC's! after all that, 3 pens, and a few too many hand and eye cramps, i completed the gopo exam in time to immerse myself into no thought. i found i couldnt think after that exam, what an odd feeling. i could have stood staring at a brick wall and woke up an hour later, really folks, it was that bad. screw gopo....
my 2nd shit-fest of the day wasnt as bad as the first. band is typically an easy class, you play some, lie some and you're through. but the lying catches up to you on an exam. at least there were no essays (damn the essays!). first we have theory... i dont know why in the hell they would teach us theories instead of real stuff. i mean, what if it changes and we have to learn it all over again? what if we get hit by an asteroid with a new gas element and it gets mixed in with the air and the vibrations and wavelengths change and they have to rewrite the theory? what then?? anyway, we had a theory test and that was easy so i dont care... pt 2 was on rock music which of course i did great on because one of my mottos is "i love rock music" so it was easy. last, we had a friggen score study which inherently looks easy until you learn that you failed it so i dont worry about it. last of all we had scales and "sightreading." umm question: why is it called sight reading when you read all music by sight? but anyway, i screwed up the scales of course cuz im a moron but thats ok because i had fun doing it. the "sightreading" wasnt too hard but was hard enough to embarrass me sooo i screwed that up too, typical of me and my exam habits. but its all allright because that day is over and tomorrow is a new day with new exams and hopefully there will be another post and maybe tomorrow there will be cheese on my hell/pepper cracker... please god, dont skimp with the cheese....
posted by sunshine at 10:11 PM
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