according to indian researchers, drinking soda can help cause esophageal cancer which is usually fatal. the rebellious human attitude forces me to run and get a soda. mmmm... soda. twitch. i was also unfortunate enough to have just seen the ending of vh-1's 50 most awesomely bad songs again which i really enjoyed because thats some funny shit but now i have "we built this city on rock and roll" stuck in my head. i dont even know the song and its still lodged in there. i should be playing guitar to dislodge the sucker but im not. i should be writing in other things but im clearly not doing that either. what a fucked kid i be.

im half rescinding... umm... taking back what i said last post about dreams. i still think they have a wonderful effect on life but mine dont seem to be able to get along. in the two nights since the dream i wrote about ive had dreams that conflict it. i agree with both. its more than i can bear. oh yes, its more than i can bear. mmmm... soda.

people who drive on roads are assholes. one of my friends pointed out today how nobody has the courtesy to wave or signal when you do something nice to them anymore. ive thought about that too. im an agressive driver... sortof. not an asshole though, i let people in, do nice things all the time but are never credited for it. its frustrating really. people need to grow some fucking balls and have some courtesy. dammit.

and what to do about guitar? ive reached a symbolic plateau. done something i never figured i would do. perhaps too afraid to do simply because of the overpowering emotional pain it would cause. but i did it and now it doesnt scare me at all. so where do i go from here? ive about exhausted all the good material from my parent resource and what to move on to? ah well, there will always be something. this is a really good pepsi.

oh and always drink pepsi. it is southern and wonderful.

dadadadaaaa... in other news. hmm... it seems keith richards did an off-the-cuff performance up north somewhere recently. (keith richards is the lead guitarist for the rolling stones for you uncultured types). just got up onstage and played with the two guys up there. keith richards is a god. this is what is wonderful about musicianship and rock and roll. im sure he didnt get paid for it, not like he needs it. ive seen the dvd's of those old boys in shows. just up there having fun. thats what rock and roll is all about people, keith richards is what rock and roll is all about. hell, he may have even been playing blues i think. its what music is about. i dont play guitar to get paid. in fact, the entire thing has probably been hundreds of dollars that might never be made back but thats ok because it is one of the most enjoyable and relaxing things in my life right now. music is a beautiful thing. shit, i can even respect those guys from slipknot if they were just having fun. keith richards is my hero.

mmmm... soda.

on a completely different topic, it is odd how things work out sometimes. unvoiced opinions can be felt from miles away and perhaps obeyed. hurts either way. sometimes there just arent any good solutions for what ails you out there. what can you do then? try and ignore your problems... not really. im starting to wonder if 'let it be' is perhaps the most valuable advice out there or not. sucks to stand by and watch things happen and not speak up or at least inquire, in that mundane daily habit sort of way, how someone is doing. even if you do it every single fucking day, dont speak to them for a couple days without asking them to and it will get to you. and it will suck when you finally break down and do it to because then you are weak and any hope for equality has been lost. either way, sucks to be there. sucks to be ignored even if its rational when its light outside. its never rational in the dark. nothing is rational in the dark.