its nice when click the lights are out and suddenly i am out of my chair, risen somehow without a command from my brain just a... well... logical reaction from my body to roll, to lean, to somehow induce forward motion and ultimately get up out of that chair i was in and continue on somehow and im not sure how. just vaguely, its an odd thing to be, to be moving vaguely myself and its not my surroundings moving past me but actually me floating, vaguely, floating without thought through the dark, dodging couches and shoes and chairs and coasting over the threshold and through the doorway without a sound toward the glow of this very monitor... its odd to think that you havent been thinking but rather just moving and playing along with life the entire time without a care for organized floating just... less than instinct and more of nature, more auto-pilot than trance because awareness is a major factor in what is happening but apathy towards the rest is what allows it to be so magical. just floating, out of the chair not thinking about friction or pain if there even was any but it just doesnt matter. just floating through the room with the ambiant glow of the tv set behind me now and being drawn toward the confined glow of this monitor all because that mental note came into play, that mental note that waited until it was time, when i had consciously finished the chapter and found a suitable temporary location for the book, waited until then to flip the switch and unconsciously fumble in circles for the correct knob and click the light off and begin this whole process where soon, gliding across the room like mr. burns on his drugs and without any ambivalence in the world, just me and my illogical personal hovering self sliding across the rug without a sound through the open doorway and ungracefully find the chair to sit myself down in.

its nice like it was this afternoon just sitting outside in the hammock, no longer swinging very much because that is difficult to stomach when reading but, allowing release from the original plan, the very original plan which is suitable to adjustment at any point in time and even though i was not yet through with the chapter outlined in the plan, it was alright because the plan is adjustable in many directions, flexible like myself, bendable, foldable, moldable, and ultimately doable because of its simple plan-ness. so naturally i mark the page and close the book to be finished later on... see above... and just lay there thinking about sensing every possible detail of the world around me. but, as most summer nights outside do tend to end, it was thundering and i was under a tree which never really bothered me to begin with but the flies were beginning to turn the entire situation off. it was very pleasant to lay under that tree, strung out on wires, and listen to the wind and the planes and the thunder and the creature noises in surround sound but inevitably mosquitoes bite and knats, after seemingly no searching at all... for they manage it so quickly... find my left ear (which i swat) and subsequently my right ear (same treatment) and eventually find themselves in perpetual limbo between those two dangerous poles but dont give up. yeah, its me that gives up so across the rocks, not floating because i clearly recognize the friction and the pain this time as bare feet slide across barren stones, and back into the basement and up the stairs not floating the entire way and back inside to my confined little life and back into myself for now.

goodnight