i actually came in here to write a poem. but with the guys yelling about poker and my laundry laundering downstairs and damien rice trying to play on these little speakers... the poetry has drained right out of my head. no focusing... i want to play these songs. suppose i can, really, except i dont have an acoustic guitar here. its just not the same trying it on an electric. figure i will borrow one of the girls' and, if im lucky - or maybe if i suck it up and drive - i can have one at the beach this weekend. cant really think of a better thing to do at the beach than sit outside by the shore playing. maybe someday that will actually happen.

it gets tiring being here. too much, too often.

there are some things that dont change. i dont feel like bitching. i dont feel like opening up. not here anyway... i really want to.

fuck this. i dont have the energy.